the end? quando il sogno si trasforma in un incubo

sorry for not coming to the dinner tomorrow. I really like Kevin and Emma, but I do not think it makes a lot of sense going there together as if we were a normal and happy couple when we are not. We are drowning in misunderstanding and incomprehensions.

You seem to be so busy writing your project, and in anxiety when you are with me for not having enough time, but I don't know how you always find time to go to the pub with your friends, watching football and all the rest, drink yourself to death and be hungover the day after. But when it comes to spend an afternoon with me, the world falls down.

It' s just for me that you don't have enough time.

Then you know what? just fuck off

Call when you have time to spend time just with me if you are even slightly interested in having some , maybe i will  still be here when you open your eyes and realize that you are losing me 

"Now all I read is poetry. Poetry is the one thing that

isn't contaminated, the one thing that isn't part of

the game"

                                                                                        Young Guerra in "2666", Roberto Bolanio.

LOST IN LOVE

nauseous
sleepy
useless defeaning noises
irritating lights
choking
it looks like Tokyo
it's just the absence of you.

the world looks like a better place today...

WE

MELTED

IN

THE SAME

BREATH...

and I wanted to forget the existence of water

and quench my thirst with your semen...

and I wanted to forget the existence of water

and be pervaded by the scent of your sweat...

pic:Man Ray

210

"I will tie you up

and slap your face

[...]

I will mimic rape

in all its attributes"

KENDRA GRANT MALONE

tODAY

i HAD a LOOk

aT the BUSEs rOUTES

aND fOUND ouT

tHAT #210

tAKES lIKE 10 mINUTEs

fROm WHeRE YOu lIVE

tO wHERE i WORk

aND i wANTEd tO CrY

aND kICK tHE gARBAGe bINS

aND WoNDEReD

whY tHE HEll

yOU aRE NOt CAllING,

wHy YoU raN aWAY.

aND It SEems lIKE

aLL tHe BUSeS oF The wORLD

aRE goING THrOUGh aRCHwaY

nOw.

Feeling like Bukowski

You don't know how boring it is

to sit down at a table

listening to conversations about the new watch

of Patek Philippe,

about how to advertise on Vogue,

about bank accounts...

I wish I was brave enough

to get so pissed to lose my senses,

vomit all my rage on those white shirts

and then

slowly

fade

away...

I wish I was crazy enough to get undressed,

climb up the table

and yell to these people

that money buys everything but no salvation,

that we all live in the same hell....

But I am just sitting down at this table

writing these not really inspired lines,

downing my fifth glass

of excellent rosé wine,

getting silently drunk...

And it feels good

being wrapped by the patina

of intoxication,

oh God if it feels good

despite all the useless chatting.

the way you fuck me

I fucked him because

I wanted to be fucked by you.

Because I NEEDED

to be fucked by you,

to fill up the empty space

left by your absence.

His cock was huge and rock hard

but I could not feel it.

Yours just fits so perfectly in my vagina,

as if it was born there.

He banged me hard and slapped

and choked me

and my mind was with you.

I screamed loud and I was

still with you.

He came

and I overflew with you.

What the hell did you do to me?

I want myself back.

NOW

amore, sogni...edifici che cadono

Wir haben uns im Traum verpasst
Du träumst mich, ich dich
Keine Angst ich weck' dich nicht
Bevor du nicht von selbs erwachst
bitte, bitte wech' mich nicht
solang ich träum' nur gibt es dich...


( We missed each other in our dreams
You dream me, I you
Don't worry, I won't wake you
Before you wake up yourself
You dream me, I you
Don't worry, I'll find you
Before you wake up yourself)...

I'm waiting at the wrong pole,

sto aspettando nel polo sbagliato..

Denn du träumst mich, ich dich
ich träum' dich, du mich
Wir träumen uns beide wach

( e poi tu sogni me, io te,

io ti sogno, tu a me,

entrambi ci sogniamo da svegli)

si, si solo sogni....

NEVER LOVED YOU

Submerged in this boundless puddle of rotten blood,

I ponder if I am still alive.

I stick my finger tip in the wound.

It is dry now.

The blood seems not to be there anymore, most of it went out of my body.

I am asphyxiating.

I vomited all the rests of the feast we had together,

I have seen them flowing away with my hope.

I never loved you, I do not know why I feel as you cut my limbs.

I never loved you, I do not know why I feel as you sucked my blood.

I never loved you, I do not know why I feel as if you had been rummaging between my organs and left me empty.

It is a pale barren landscape I see now and light is penetrating prepotent through my closed eyelids…

Flamal 4

I am just hating myself.
And surviving, rather than living..

INDEPENDENCE DAY

AND I DONT THINK WAR IS NOBLE

AND I DONT LIKE TO THINK THAT LOVE IS LIKE WAR

BUT I GOT A BIG HOT CHERRY BOMB, AND I WANT TO SLIP IT THROUGH THE MAIL SLOT OF YOUR FRONT DOOR

I like you.

A lot.

But I'm kind of scared.

I'm so bloody scared...

Scared of being trapped within you...

You are there, in front of me, and you look like a cobweb....

You know cobwebs, don't you??

They are beautiful, they have fantastic geometric patterns, amazing!!

But they trap you, if you get into them,and you can be stuck there for ever..

and maybe even be eaten...

THE GIRL WHO WANTED TO BE GOD

My silver web of happiness is destroyed

when reality

conflicts with imagination....

MUTOID

I do not belong to anything, to any side of the street, to any bank of the river,

and as such, I will always feel

lost.

I am like a

mutant,

in an unending evolution..

I am with you all guys, but I will always feel

lost.

And alone...

YOU
AND ME,
A NO THROUGH ROAD,
HOPE GOT LOST
TIME AGO.

ETERNAL SUNSHINE OF THE SPOTLESS MIND..

Why do I fall in

LOVE

with every [man] that pays me the least of
attention?

People love me, adore me, they always call, they wanna see me. Its just me that I don’t love me, and you the one who never calls.

I don’t look lovely, as you said. I look sad.

At Mattia’s. Ten in the morning. Sylvia Plath, the only sister of my soul, green tea. Leaving again. Every time I am here, frenzy and movement, speed. I split myself in one thousand, but there is never enough for everybody. People move, emigrate, change. There are those who leave, those who stay, those who come back, and those who arrive, for the first time. I cannot expect them to stay here, waiting for me while I wander all around... I fly away, and them as well. I will be back, maybe they won’t.

Scrivere
per sopravvivere.
Even if sometimes
surviving
appears impossible to me...

ALL THAT JAZZ 3

Jazz just has this power, you know. To make me escape from reality, to bring me to a parallel dimension whenever I do not like this world anymore. I listen and I forget. Everything.

The concert is finished and I am born again.

FRIENDSHIP

NATI MISS YAAAAAAAAAAAAAA